October 30, 2008

The Owner of APN Needs Your Help!

DeAnna Ferlitsch (otherwise known as HappyMomAnna or Anna Glendenning) is going Public with a Request that the Supporters of the Adoptive Parents Network consider contributing to the March of Dimes in order to Promote Awareness about the issues that will help prevent Premature Birth as well as the Life Long damage caused to unborn babies when exposed to Alcohol and Drugs!

On November 13, 2008 I will Arrested and Held for Bail (Lunch) I would be so proud if the Adoptive Parents Network is able to raise a nice Bail for this Cause as it is important to the lives of our children and future children.

I am also VERY Honored to have been selected as a Leader in the Community for this important Fund Raiser!

SET ME FREE! …and help the March of Dimes arrest the rising rate of premature birth. 1 in 8 babies is born to soon, and often too small. These tiniest babies struggle to survive, and too often many don’t.

I will soon be incarcerated in the March of Dimes Jail & Bail where I will be served only the finest bread and water (okay, maybe lunch!) You can help ensure my good behavior through your contribution. My hard earned bail will aid and abet the March of Dimes in funding lifesaving programs of research, education and community services. Programs that will save babies’ lives.

The March of Dimes mission is to improve the health of babies by preventing birth defects, premature birth and infant mortality.

Contributions may be made with PayPal or by Credit Card directly with the March of Dimes at This Link


I hope that the Adoptive Parents Network may be known as people willing to support the Health of all Unborn Babies and that our visitors and Members will see it in their hearts to add what they are able to My Bail!

October 17, 2008

Help APN Out of March of Dimes Jail and Bail

Press Release:
Friday October 17, 2008
For Immediate Publication

From: The Offices of the Adoptive Parents Network LLC

The Adoptive Parents Network was contacted this morning by The March of Dimes. We were informed that we have been turned in and need to appear before the judge at the Outback Steakhouse on November 13, 2008 at 11:00 AM.

Right now only two members of the Adoptive Parents Network have been contacted to appear on the charge of "Most wanted leaders and citizens." Adoptive Parents living in the Metro Portland Oregon and Southwest Washington area can contact Anna for information about Jail Visits or attending court with me!

I'm not completely sure how it all works yet! I am waiting for some information from my legal council. I do know that So far the only thing I understand is that the bail amount in cases like this are usually set as High as possible...

Below Is some of the information I have found on the Internet about cases like the one Adoptive Parents Network is faced with today:

Jail & Bail Greater Oregon Chapter of the March of Dimes

Join your community’s most wanted leaders and citizens in serving time and raising bail in the form of donations to the March of Dimes.

Jail & Bail Outback Steakhouse


This year March of Dimes has been commandeered by pirates! Pirates are taking over and capturing the community’s most wanted citizens and throwing them into the slammer. These captives will be forced to walk the plank unless they collect enough treasure to bail themselves out. The pirate booty will go toward improving the health of all babies by funding research to prevent birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality.

If you are interested in Helping the Adoptive Parents Network support the March of Dimes contributions may be made at This Link


October 14, 2008

National Adoption Awareness Month 2008 -- Official Website Launched

The Child Welfare Information Gateway, in partnership with the Collaboration to AdoptUsKids, recently announced the launch of the website for National Adoption Month 2008.

The early launch of the website allows everyone the opportunity to access information and materials and markn their calendars for events well in advance of the month-long celebration in November.

Recognized by Presidential Proclamation, National Adoption Month is a time set aside to raise awareness about the need for adoptive parents for children and youth in foster care. Under the leadership of the Children's Bureau, National Adoption Month focuses the nation's attention on the 496,000 children in foster care across the country, including the 130,000 children awaiting adoption.

The National Adoption Month website features a number of resources, including:

  • A Calendar of activities for National Adoption Awareness Month, November 2008.

  • Calendars and other materials are available in English and Spanish.

  • Highlights and information.

  • Enhanced search tools for the Spanish version of the National Foster Care and Adoption Directory

  • Resources for professionals, families, and teachers.

  • Resources from AdoptUsKids.

Be sure to Visit the 2008 Website for access and resources about National Adoption Month! And be sure to stay connected to the Adoptive Parents Network for all the inormation about APNs plans, contests and events!

September 23, 2008

Fostering Connections to Success and Increasing Adoptions Act of 2008

Fostering Connections to Success and Increasing Adoptions Act of 2008(HR 6893)was passed by the U.S. House of Representatives on September 17 and The U.S. Senate passed the bipartisan Act yesterday, September 22. Now it's headed to the President for his signature.

The Fostering Connections to Success and Increasing Adoptions Act of 2008(HR 6893), is the most significant legislation relating to adoption and foster care since the Adoption and Safe Families Act of 1997 was passed. This new legislation includes reforms designed to benefit children in foster care and their best interest in adoption planning and placement.

Some of the reforms include:

  • Reauthorizing of the Adoption Incentives Program. Where the federal government allocates financial incentives for states with an increase in the number of children adopted from the foster care system, through 2013.

  • Increased funding amounts states receive from the Adoption Incentives Program by establishing 2007 as the new “base year” for measurement of future performance, and increasing the additional funding for special needs and older child adoptions.

  • Ensures all children with special needs placed out of foster care for adoption are eligible for federal adoption assistance--regardless of the adoptive family's income by 2018

  • Mandates states to inform prospective adoptive parents about their eligibility for the federal adoption tax credit.

  • Requires the states to make reasonable efforts to place siblings together.

  • Allows the states an option to extend adoption assistance, foster care maintenance and relative guardianship assistance payments for children aged 18, 19 or 20.

While this Act doesn't resolve some of the very real reforms needed for the foster care and adoption systems it does expand and maintain some of the important elements that have made it possible for more families to be able to adopt children waiting in foster care and meet some of their extraordinary special needs.

The government leaders responsible for the passage of the Fostering Connections to Success and Increasing Adoptions Act of 2008(HR 6893)include:

  • Representative Jim McDermott (D-WA)

  • Representative Jerry Weller (R-IL)

  • Senator Baucus (D-MT)

  • Senator Grassley (R-IA) and

  • Senator Rockefeller (D-WV)

Please contact these Senators and Representatives to thank them for their leadership on this vital issue and let them know we are out here and appreciate this step and hope we can count on their attention to other matters important to foster care and adoption reforms in the future.

GovTrack.us. H.R. 6893--110th Congress (2008): Fostering Connections to Success and Increasing Adoptions Act of 2008, GovTrack.us (database of federal legislation) (accessed Sep 23, 2008)

September 12, 2008

Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders (FASD) Awareness

The focuse this week at the Adoptive Parents Network has been Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder information and awareness. There has been a lot of new resources added to the APN Resource Network as well as several blogs written about this very real social issue.

This video is very powerful:

Related Links:

August 26, 2008

A little Quite with busy Parents

It's one of those times during the year that most parents are eyebrow deep getting ready for a transition back to school and routine. The Back-to-School count down is on, or in some cases over depending on where you live.

This is one time of the year it is very common for parents to have little time for chit-chat or posting on forums. August, and Late December through February are generally very slow time when it comes to the Adoptive Parents Network forums.

Which is part of who we are and what this place is all about! The members here are parents first and live comes before playing on the Internet. Some of our newer members waiting for the process to end with their post saying they have become parents may not be aware of how their lives will soon change when they add a baby or child to their families.

This time of the year is a drain and there is so much to do when there is a child in the home--especially, it that child is school aged. Between all the efforts to squeeze every last bit of fun out of the summer routine and getting ready for school most of the mom's I know are running around in a spending spree of panic with an underlying spark of joy and glee!

It may be all quiet here but, rest assured once our children ride the bus to school, and their teachers get to know them--the Adoptive Parents Network Forum will be a flurry of posts about everything from IEP issues, behaviors, and funny stories about lost or stolen lunch money!

Right now most parents of a school aged child are simply operating on "cruise control" enduring the annual ritual of transition back to Mom has time to Dust and Mop as well as post on the Adoptive Parents Network Forum about the things found hidden under the sheets in the hall linen closet...

Here's to everyone waiting for the sound of the school bus breaks! Can't want to see you when the dust and first of the year papers are settled...

....where was that coupon for the free manicure with the 30 minute neck massage?

August 24, 2008

APN Resource Network: Link Share

As a part of Adoptive Parents Network's new Resource section visitors and members are invited to add links to any valuable website under ten different categories.

The APN Resource Network Link Share is designed to offer visitors or members a quick and easy way to Add a Link to our Network Resource Link Share.


If you have discovered our found a useful resource website please feel free to add it to the APN Resource Network Link Share. At this time we have the following categories to choose from:

  • Adoption Information (general) Add or read links to websites that offer general information and support about adoption, statistics, organizations and other websites that visitors and members of the Adoptive Parents Network might find useful.

  • Domestic Adoption This is the perfect category for visitors and members to share information about websites those interested in adopting privately may find helpful. Including, newborn private adoption, and Step Parent Adoption.

  • Foster Adoption Add or find those important website links for all those different places Foster parents, Foster to Adopt parents and pre Adoptive Parent placements for children in foster care may ever want or need.

  • International Adoption Laws, rules and issues are always changing. Be sure to add any links about the issues International Adoptive parents and families may need to know about.

  • Parenting Do you know a great parenting site, or a website that offers parents tools, services or tips that might help them in problem areas, or in general? Then please share it here with all of the visitors of the Adoptive Parents Network... Our First goal is to be the best parents we can be so Share your Secrets websites here!

  • Support Groups & Training Do you know of any great support group websites, or websites published by support groups? How about Post Adoption Services and any announcement sites? Share it with Adoptive Parents Network here on our Resource Network and also in our Forums where there are boards for each State and nearly any specific issue that may be related! The more we share it here the more people in the specific locations may have the opportunity to know about the various efforts available to help support each other in Real Life!

  • Education This is not just and adoptive parents issue but, it is also one of the greatest issues many parents face. The education Resource Links are set aside for any informative, supportive or helpful website parents and adoptive parents might need as we deal with the educational issues of today!

  • Mental Health and all the services we find and don't find! This is another area where the more information we can share the better informed another parent may be if they should face the same kinds of issues. Today, we see an ever increasing need for Child Mental Health services and a complete failure for their to be a safety net in place for some children with the greatest needs. Please share what you find with all of us about Mental Health in this category of the APN Resource Network.

  • Special Needs Whatever the need might be, if you have found a website with information or support for special needs parents then we hope you will consider sharing that link with everyone here.

  • Advocate Adoptive Parents Network not only hopes to connect parents with each other, but to also unit parents in the identification of issues and efforts to Advocate for reform and change. We believe that as a larger more organized voice we might find some ways to help solve a few problems or at least help see changes in things that are not working.

If you don't have anything to add to the APN Resource Network Link Share, it's no big deal please just remember it and check it out next time you are looking for something!

August 21, 2008

The APN Resource Network

One of the unique qualities the Adoptive Parents Network website wants to offer is connections and sharing or information and resources. Our goal is to provide a website which makes it simple for our members and visitors to add to the information and support offered.

Adoptive Parents Network has just added a new Main Menu Link and Section to the website... the APN Resource Network. As this section is developed it will become the HUB of resources and infromation for foster, adoptive and special needs parents.

There are several tools for visitors and members to contribute, connect and find resources for a variety of topics that relate to becoming foster, adoptive and special needs parents.

APN Resource Network offers visitors and members easy access. The APN Resource Network features a variety of tools offering those who want to stay connected with the resouce network several options for quick and easy location as well as notification.

The Adoptive Parents Network main website fetures a direct link in the top menue on most of the website pages. Visitors and members are always one click away from the Network Resources.

Visitors and members are also offered easy access from outside of the main website. By visiting directly using your browser navagation and entering the direct link: http://apnresources.blogspot.com/

Clicking from inside APN.com will keep visitors inside APN.com In order to access from outsite enter the url directly in your browser. If your interest is to stay up to date on new information added to the APN Resource Network visitors and members can subscribe to this section by email or read it from a variety of feed readers.

The APN Resource Network features a tool designed to allow any visitor or member to Add a Link to our Network Resource Link Share with several current categories to choose from:

Adoption Information (general)
Domestic Adoption
Foster Adoption
International Adoption
Support Groups & Training
Mental Health
Special Needs

APN looks forward to expanding the Network Resource section and by offering information and easy to use tools designed to connect parents with information and services designed to support Foster, Adoptive and Special Needs parents. Our goal is that not only will parents have access to these resources with ease, but that they also contribute by adding links and commenting on the articles posted.

July 31, 2008

Fast and Snappy verses Processing Delays

As summer drags on and I find myself spending lots of extra time interacting with my children it's easy for me to get stuck thinking that all I ever do is "correct, order and reprimand" all day long...

Considering the fact that my lovely 10-year-old daughter has Fetal Alcohol Spectrume Disorders -- FASD, I have learned to be more patient with my instructions to her as well as recognize the fact that I will need to repeat myself over and over... I will need to Re-Teach her the same basic skills over and over... Prompt and remind over and over... doing so with Love and Tolerance.

The truth has been that since the moment I came to terms with the fact that FASD and in her case, Alcohol-Related Neurodevelopmental Disorders -- ARND, is not a behavior issue things have been much easier to deal with. What I used to view as her Reactive Attachment Disorder -- RAD behaviors seem to be more simple to manage and interestingly some of the most difficult behavior problems of a year ago have changed completely.

Things had become so difficult with Makala that we were not sure if we would be able to live that way much longer. Our attention had been working on "Attachment" for the four long years we had been together as a family. It's difficult to be told that a child behaves they way mine did--just because the child isn't attached to ME!

I had tried all the advice given by other parents with RAD Kid's and things only got worse in our home... Much worse.

You see, it's pretty hard for a child who has brain damage to be expected to react, respond or even understand the words they are hearing... at least right at the moment the words were spoken.

My perspective a year ago was right in line with the advice I was getting about "How To" parent a RAD Child. I was doing Attachment Parenting by the numbers, and feeling like the world around me simply had no clue what living with a RAD Kid is like... I was expecting my daughter to be "Fast and Snappy" and to do what I told her to do right when I told her to do it... I wasn't counting 1-2-3 so she would have three more chances to ignore me... Consequences were delivered swiftly and consistantly. And I expected her to look in my eyes when I spoke to her... This time last summer her room was nearly empty and there wasn't much else to take away from her without it going into the "abusive" side of consequences...

She wasn't happy.

I wasn't happy.

No One in this house was happy.

Things have changed a lot this year and it's mostly been because of the way I have changed how I deal with life. Learning to understand that brain damage caused by prenatal drug or alcohol exposure isn't the same as Not Attaching has changed our world.

Many parents dealing with the same or simular issue we have parenting our daughter seem to believe that RAD is the primary problem and that without healing the Reactive Attachment Disorer must happen before nearly anything else. I disagree and to be honest I didn't become a mother so that someone would Love and Attach to me. I became a mother so that I could raise up nice grown-up's who went on to have nice stable lives... If the kid's love and attach to me that's a bonus!

Fast and Snappy is how some therapists and RAD Parents Expect their child to respond when given an instruction. The child needs to learn to follow directions and react instantly when asked or told to do something. If the child doesn't respond Fast and Snappy then the child is simply being a Radish and resisting the control the parent has over their lives. Not jumping up and doing what they are told that Moment is seen as a sign of defiance...


Children with brian damage casued by prenatal Alcohol or Drug exposure often show this damage in areas of Processing information and limited short-term memory. These childrean just might NOT have processed an instruction or words spoken by the time they are in trouble and mom is counting 1-2-3 and giving out consequences. A child with FASD isn't willfully ignoring her parent's words nor is it about Attachment.

The bottom line for me and my family has been that Fast and Snappy only counts if the child is able to process new information and is in a state of mind where short-term memory isn't gone for the moment.

When the RAD Mom that I am stopped and came to understand that everything isn't about attachment and some things are about real life long and unrepairable brain damage our entire world has changed and so has Makala's.

July 28, 2008

It's Time to Call YOUR Senator: Reauthorize the Adoption Incentives Program!

As I have written in the past the federal program providing the funds for Adoption Incenives which includ the monthly adoption assistance or subsidy payments expires in 2010. As most adoptive families may or may not remember there was and is not guarentee adoption assistance subsidies will Always be there for families and that includes those families currently recieving subsudy assistance.

It's time to make that Call to Washington! It's time to ask our Senators to act Right NOW and reauthorize the Adoption Incentive Program in order to promote adoption of children from foster care!

CALL IN LINE ARE OPEN TODAY and Tomorrow--Monday and Tuesday, July 28 and 29.


It is very simple to make this call simpply dial the number and follow the voice prompts. You will be asked to enter your ZIP code and then connected directly to your Senator’s office. Today is the day to ask you senator to reauthorize the Adoption Incentive Program!

Currently there are 129,000 children and young people in foster care waiting to leave the system – for good – to join permanent families by adoption. Every day without a permanent family feels like a lifetime to a child.

The bipartisan Adoption Incentive Program has helped more than 443,000 children leave the uncertainty of foster care to join adoptive families – but unless Congress acts now, it will expire on September 30, 2008.

The House acted unanimously to improve and reauthorize the Adoption Incentive Program in late June. Please join us in urging the Senate to act before August recess begins.

Senators on the Finance Committee, which has jurisdiction over the nation’s foster care system, will play a key role in promoting safe, permanent families for our most vulnerable children.

Please call your senators if you are from one of the following states:

If you live in one of the following states please take a moment and call:


  • Arizona
  • Arkansas
  • Colorado
  • Idaho
  • Iowa
  • Kansas
  • Kentucky
  • Oregon
  • Maine
  • Massachusetts
  • Michigan
  • Montana
  • Nevada
  • New Hampshire
  • New Mexico
  • New York
  • North Dakota
  • Oregon
  • Utah
  • Washington

Urge the Senate to reauthorize and improve the Adoption Incentive Program to promote adoption for children in foster care!

Please help spread the word by forwarding this e-mail to your friends, family, colleagues, and networks and encourage others to take action today! Please post this inforamation in other Adoption Forums and Write Blogs about this issue right away....

Click here for a downloadable flyer.

And Be Sure to POST that you have called and spread the word by letting everyone on the Adoptive Parents Network Forums KNOW!